The Gift of Holding Space For Others
By Lisa SugarmanAs human beings, we represent a lot of different things to a lot of different people over the course of our lives. Often, we’re a combination of parents or partners or spouses or co-workers or siblings or friends or children. Or, in some cases, all of the above. And in each of those very different roles, one of the greatest gifts we can give to any of those people is to hold space for them. You know, to just, in the purest and most profound way, be there for them. To listen without judgement. To do nothing but absorb what another person is sharing or telling or confiding in the most compassionate of ways.And it’s beautiful. Both for that special person, as well as for ourselves.So, I’m curious, when was the last time you held space for someone? The last time you gave another person the opportunity to open up to you and truly be heard. Authentically. The last time you really just sat and listened, without jumping to conclusions or offering feedback or criticism. And for no other reason than to simply receive whatever it was they needed to share?Was it recently? Was it too long ago to remember? Was it ever?
So, if you’ve never held space for another person, that circle of trust is worth stepping into. It’s worth establishing that kind of human connection with the people around us because it’s through that basic act of showing up for someone that we can deepen our own sense of compassion and empathy and love.
If you have shown up like that for the people in your life, then you’re way ahead of the game in terms of understanding the depth of the human connection that we all have the capacity for if we really commit ourselves. And isn’t that what it’s all about at the end of the day?I sure think it is.Lisa Sugarman lives just north of Boston, Massachusetts. She writes the nationally syndicated opinion column It Is What It Is and is the author of How to Raise Perfectly Imperfect Kids and Be Ok with It—Real Tips & Strategies for Parents of Today's Gen Z Kids, Untying Parent Anxiety: 18 Myths That Have You in Knots—And How to Get Free, and LIFE: It Is What It Is, available on Amazon, at Barnes & Noble, and at select bookstores everywhere. Read and discuss all her columns and books at lisasugarman.com. Or, find her on GrownAndFlown.com, Hot Moms Club, LittleThings.com, MommingHubb.com, 50 Shades of Aging, More Content Now, Wickedlocal.com, This Mama Wines, and Care.com.